A Little Something I Wrote

The other day this piece popped into my head. I could literally see the story playing out. This hasn't happened in a while which told me that this was an important piece to write. 

I shared it with a friend who called in "heartbreaking" and that's exactly the thing. My heart was breaking and I needed to write the pain out. 

I thought I'd share it with you.

The Slow Death

Plain as she can be, she never dreamed she’d be here. In this place. In this time. Staring down the barrel of several loaded guns. Caught in the crosshairs. Waiting for the one willing to pull the trigger.

Her deer eyes blink slowly, but she is frozen. Too scared to move. Too scared to stay where she is. Her body trembles as she feels the weight of the scopes, scanning the best place to plant the bullet that could lead to her demise.

Her only path is dark and overgrown with underbrush. She could hide well, but there are even scarier things waiting for her there. Creatures with sharpened teeth and razor-like claws who wish to rip her tender flesh from her body are concealed from the light of the day.

Her body shudders slightly, visible only to those closest to her. She slowly turns, allowing her body to block others who stand as terrified as she.  She bares her neck to the ones holding the guns. The ones who would kill her with one shot. She is willing to lie bleeding out on the forest floor to protect those who aren’t as willing to die as is she.

She hears the soft sighs of the hunters as she waits for the bullet to pierce her flesh. She turns slowly to look at the hunters…one at a time. She nickers softly, encouraging the others to flee and not return for her. She is willing to meet her fate. After all, no one will miss her. She is nothing to them. Just another trophy for their wall and meals for their families.

She hears a man call something. With a deep breath, her long lashed eyes close. She hears men’s laughter as she opens her eyes to find the darkest haired of the men making his way toward her, his hand outstretched, reaching to run his fingers over her trembling body. He speaks in such a low and calming manner as he strokes his hands over her. She feels her body leaning into him, begging him for more. The one wild creature in the forest that aches for the touch of man. The touch of THIS man.

His friends are teasing him as he slowly runs his long fingers of her. He smiles and her heart melts. Today she will not die in the way she anticipated. Instead she will die because this man will merely carry her heart with him as he walks away. And he will walk away. They all walk away. She is a wild creature not meant to be loved in any capacity. She is merely for men’s entertainment and amusement. She is not meant to have forever. She is only meant for the here and now.

The man coaxes her to follow him and the wild in her heart aches to be free. He does not understand that wild things aren’t made to be domesticated simply because they’re terrified of having their spirits broken.

Again, he whispers murmurs of love. Her heart races because there is nothing she wants more than to be loved by this man. However, he like the others will hurt her. He’s a man. He doesn’t know any other way to be. But, god, this man. This man she wants to love more than the others before him. He teases her to follow him towards the edge of the clearing.

His friends continue to tease and laugh. In her heart, she knows they’re laughing at her stupidity and willingness to give herself over to him for one more stroke of his hands over her. She tried to tune them out and just enjoy the moment. The man then laughs and shoos at her. “Stupid woman! Did you really think I’d love you?”

She feels her heart shatter into a millions pieces and tears fall from her big doe-like eyes. The droplets cling to her lashes as she looks at him, her wounded heart glistening in her eyes. She slowly turns to walk into the dense underbrush, praying to be devoured by the dark creatures with fangs and claws. It would be so much easier than the slow death of falling in love.

-GKM-6192020

Oh, Grow Up!

RANT ALERT:

Something happened the other day that sort of got this author wound up. Someone very near and dear to me made a post, a very mild mannered post, about how this political crap people are posting on social media had her unfollowing certain friends until after this election is over. She used two, count them two, expletives. A "friend" thought is was suitable to tattle to my near and dear's mother. Seriously? Are we in grade school?

As adults, we are supposed to be setting examples for our children, right? If we get all butthurt over the fact that someone doesn't use language we approve of or doesn't believe the same way we do, how do we expect our kids to grow up to be healthy adults? Yeah, I'm that woman. I don't believe in "participation" ribbons/trophies for sporting events. I believe that teachers SHOULD use red pens to correct papers. I believe that children should be allowed to stand up for themselves.



I am so over this generation of kids who have entered the world believing they are entitled to something. They are raised thinking the world owes them something for their existence. They don't have to study or train to prove themselves, Simply drawing breath means they are entitled. They don't understand the words "menial labor." Things like daily chores are a thing of the past in most households because little Jack wants to play video games or has football practice and little Jill NEEDS to be on her social media pages with her friends. Guess what, parents! You are not here to be your child's friend. You are here to raise children into adults who understand the world will say no more often than it says yes. That hard work and perseverance will get your kid further in life than buying them everything they want will. Discipline! Holy crap! Lack of discipline is why the world is falling apart. No one understands that there are consequences for their actions anymore.

There are kids on the college campus who are delusional enough to think that because they are paying for their education that they are entitled to the grades of their choosing. They don't believe they should study hard and have to work like the rest of the students.I actually had a boy (and I do mean boy) in a math class last semester who got upset when the professor told him she couldn't read his homework assignment. And I don't mean just got upset. I mean, He slammed his chair into the table, stormed to the front of the classroom, threw the remote controls for the projector, etc. at the professor, then slammed the door shut on his way out. Half of us were so busy taking notes that we didn't realize there was a problem until the remotes spit batteries all over the front of the room. And his punishment? He wasn't allowed to return to the class. Having heard this boy's conversations with other students I can tell you that he didn't know the meaning of criticism or hard work. He didn't understand that illegible work means the person grading your papers will simply give up no matter how well you're doing. He would often walk into class worrying about studying for other classes and ask other people for their homework. Poor over privileged punk!

This boy isn't the first I've heard of or born witness to either. You have student athletes who perform well on the field for their team, but can't pull their weight in classrooms. However, they get away with it because they win for the school. This leads to professional sports players who think they can get away with things like hitting their wives, raping women, dogfighting because "Hey, I'm a winner, right?"

We have generations of these kids growing up and getting away with things simply because they have talent or a name. And as parents and a society we are tolerating it. Why? Why are we raising these kids to be this way? What ever happened to having to work your way to the top? What ever happened to struggling to get that music contract? To playing in dive bars until you make it? What ever happened to paying the dues needed in any job to get to the top? Whatever happened to "starting in the mailroom" of a company? Can anyone answer this for me?

I have to work 40 hours a week plus go to classes plus write plus work out time for a personal life. I'm not complaining, I'm stating a fact. But, I can tell you why I am in school. To get an education which will lead me to a job where I can support myself in a better lifestyle than I have now.

Do you know I have actually heard girls on campus who are there looking for a man? They will only date guys with certain majors because "mom wants me to marry well." See, this is where being an introvert isn't such bad thing. I hear things like this. Not in just one class either. This is in the hallways, at the cafes on campus, all over. We are raising our girls to worry more about finding someone to take care of them than how to take care of themselves. Which just makes them prey for the boys who don't feel like they have to earn anything...like respect. Nice combination on a college campus, huh?

I know I've strayed a bit from the opening paragraph, however, these things go hand in hand. I swear like a sailor most days. I don't care. If people don't like it, they can walk away or unfriend me. I'm not going to be someone I'm not simply because you can't handle it. I don't say things on this page or my social media pages that I won't say to your face. If you get butthurt, well, that's on you, not me. I'm entitled to my opinion. There's this little thing called the Bill of Rights that my dad and my friends have fought to defend. You want to tattle to my mommy for things I say? Go ahead, who do you think raised me? My beliefs run deep because they've been ingrained in the very heart of who I am. Remember Mr. Charming Smile from my math classes? Yeah, we talked about this a lot. Being raised in a blue collar family, we learned hard work and discipline. We weren't handed things, we had to earn them. Our families taught us the meaning of what it means to be an adult even though it frustrated the fuck out of us at the time, but...we have a great respect for our families, our community, and ourselves. And that counts for something!

Teaching your children about discipline, respect, and responsibility isn't a foreign concept. But we are so worried about giving our children their own voices that we forget that theirs aren't the only ones. Everyone is allowed their opinions...it's what makes this world so amazing. No one has the exact same beliefs and that is perfectly okay. What we forget is that if we shut up long enough and listen to the other person, maybe, just maybe we might learn something from the other humans on this planet.